I am done visiting the typical bridal boutiques and being pushed to buy a mediocre dress, I refuse to pay over two thousand dollars for a dress I will only wear once. Yes, it is a special day but seriously, I cannot afford to throw away part of my income when I could use that money to pay for a house. It’s not worth it!
After feeling overwhelmed, stressed and being unhappy with all the dresses I have tried on, I am back to square one. I thought that after visiting a bridal salon, an associate like a fairy god mother would find the perfect dress and at the sight of my dream gown, I would say with tear-eye excitement “this is the one!”
…… I’m so naive.
Damn you WE TV!
Every dress that I tried on looked the same and I would ask my self, do I want to wear this on the day my loved one and I will share our union with the world? I somehow kept being disappointed over and over again. One day on twitter while rambling over breakfast nonsense, I had a conversation with fellow IFB members and fabulous blogger Ashe Mischief, she mentioned that a great option would be a wedding dress that could be worn several times to be reminded of that special moment. Hmmm… a multi functional gown, what a fantastic idea! I decided to embark on an online hunt and came across a number of amazing concepts, short dresses, vintage and D.I.Y gowns that would make any bride-to-be look unique and special for that amazing day, check out my finds…
The Short Multi-Use Dress
I never considered a short dress until I saw these cute frilly ensembles, I absolutely love the whimsical look and this is something that you can wear anytime after the big day. Hmm… I might consider these for the civil ceremony :)
The Vintage Dress
After seeing several brides-to-be wearing beautiful vintage dresses, I think I am becoming a convert. No only do these dresses look elegant and chic but they are much more affordable than a new dress not to mention the dress pictured on the far left only cost $5.00! It looks amazing.
The D.I.Y dress
Making a dress from scratch is very special since you have to put a lot of time, effort and love. I have been sewing since I was 8 years old but I am not a professional, however John Galliano’s rendition of a wedding dress for his newest couture collection is a fabulous idea, a cute exposed teddy with a tulle skirt, it’s simple and looks fantastic. I also found an old vintage McCall’s pattern and a gorgeous dress by Vogue patterns. Stay tuned to see what crazy project I’ll embark on.
After finding so many creative ideas, I have decided to keep my options open and after reading the Off-Beat Bride , I realize that I can have a great wedding without spending a monstrous amount of money. Don’t get me wrong, I know there are many lovely ladies and guys that can afford a gorgeous opulent wedding. However, my boyfriend and I are still working our butts off since we do not have any financial help from our families but I know things will work out and we’ll have a fantastic and unique event!
What do you guys think, is it better to buy a new wedding dress from a traditional bridal store or would you wear something more unconventional for that special day?
I’m right there with ya! So much of the wedding industry is really just a scam. I already knew I didn’t want a conventional dress, but it was totally cemented after hearing horror stories of late dress arrivals, botches by shops, and poor dress quality (after all – the people who make the dresses know you’re only going to be wearing it for one day!). I ended up using a retro dress from Trashy Diva in a bright blue as my wedding dress, and I don’t regret it one bit!
I bought my wedding dress at a regular store (gorgeous white dress similar to the Seven Year Itch Marilyn Dress) for less than $100. I love your alternative options, especially the vintage and the short dresses. Based on the struggle you’ve had with the regular route I 100% say go for it with the unconventional. The dress will be much more special, and also unique and cheaper!
@Michelle
OMG yes I have heard awful stories of late arrivals as well, my cousin’s sweet sixteen dress arrived one week before the party and was cut too short, it freaks me out to think you would invest so much money and people could ruin something so special. BTW I love trashy diva, the dresses are amazing!
@Eyeliah
WOW your dress was 100$, that’s fantastic! I am really converting into doing something special and unique :)
Good for you! There are so many unimaginiative bridal gowns out there..they all look the same!!! I love the idea of the short, multi-purpose dress (but not with with my legs, hehe). My mother actually wore a little white mini dress and orange Mary-Janes to her wedding :)
I’m not even going to go with the traditional white on my wedding day; I’ll be in a luscious RED DRESS! Wooot woot!
The dress patterns are a great idea too- you can adapt/customise them to your hearts desire! Good luck! I’m sure whatever you end up with will be gorgeous :)
I kinda like the idea of buying a regular evening gown, in a color! But I will probably have someone make my dress.
Pshhht, my dress totally came from a vintage store. It’s called Reminiscence and is located on 23rd Street between 5 & 6 Ave. They always have all sorts of wedding dresses and petticoats for cheap!
P.S. Are you guys getting married?! Congratulations!!! xo
Couldn’t agree more with you Glendy! The thought of going to David’s Bridal or some other boutique that charges way too much for a bunch of tulle makes my brain hurt. Vintage or DIY is definitely the way to go. I also think that it’s ok to take some risks as far as color (beige, light blue, etc) throw something in there to make it your own. Can’t wait to see what you come up with! Speaking of weddings, have you seen the paper wedding on Martha Stewart’s site? That woman is a figgin genius!
I totally plan on making my own wedding dress (or possibly altering my graduation dress, which is white anyway.
ooh congrats, when’s the big day?
I for one was a traditionalist when it came to my wedding. To me the bridal salon with mom, grandma, sisters, and friends picking out a gown that would only be worn once was kinda the point. It was an event in itself for all of us. And yes it was crazy that my dress ( a Reem Acra) costs more than my first car but that was part of what made it special. When else would I have dress handmade in Italy with Duchesse Satin, seed pearls, and unbelievably intricate embroidery sewn for my measurements, even if it took 9 months to make it was totally worth it!
That said I am also a big believer in, your wedding dress (and actually your whole wedding) being a reflection of who you are. It’s not about what somebody else thinks is the way to do it, its what is meaningful to you. The best designer dress, or most artsy vintage find may mean half as much as wearing your mom’s dress. Or maybe the dress isn’t what does it for you and you go simple and chic with the dress and all out with the hair, the veil, and the headpiece. Bottom line whatever your budget or style you need to go with what feels right to you, and just like with your man, I do believe you’ll know it when you find it!
amen sister! XD your wedding is one of the most significant points in a woman’s life…make it the way you want it! no matter the stupid “don’t and do’s” you always see in magazines..thats all crap.
My sister wore a lovely orange dress for her wedding. It suited her – a traditional white wedding wouldn’t work at all for her personality! The wedding was 80% handmade – she made almost all the decorations (she’s an artist and when she’s got a project she dedicates EVERYTHING), had a do-it-yourself tweeter as her wedding invite, and got friends to make cakes as wedding gifts – 15 in all! She and Drew (her man) even made their own wedding rings, and she made these lovely brooches with photos of her and family & friends for the core people in the family & wedding team. It was awesome and so her and Drew :D
She’s honeymooning at the moment (the wedding was on the 18th) and will come to visit us soon, but when she gets a moment there’ll likely be photos on her blog.
Vintage is the way to go. There’s so much choice from long, bias-cut 30′s to elegant empire-line 60′s. You could even go for a 70′s Bianca Jagger style white trouser suit – very chic! It’s nice to wear something with a bit of history for your big day. Good luck with your search. x
I wore deep red for my winter wedding, but instead of buying a traditional dress I bought a Vollers corset, that I could wear again, and a long skirt with a small train and a seperate net underskirt.
Should I ever happen to be invited to a glamorous ball I could wear it again and buying the bits serperately was way cheaper!
horray! you know what… i didn’t wear a wedding dress either… i did go with a handmade dress by a canadian/berlin designer, and you know what? i LOVE IT! and my wedding wasn’t any less special because i didn’t get the big puffy hideous white thing…
[...] Unfunded, Our Ocean’s coverage of Vivienne Westwood’s appearance on Jonathan Ross and Style Amor’s refusal to buy a wedding dress, as well as some insightful interviews and gorgeous [...]
[...] from Unfunded, Our Ocean’s coverage of Vivienne Westwood’s appearance on Jonathan Ross and Style Amor’s refusal to buy a wedding dress, as well as some insightful interviews and gorgeous [...]
My wedding dress was bought from a traditional wedding dress boutique, but was entirely made from reclaimed vintage lace – so while the dress I tried on was a generic style, I knew mine would be one of a kind, and fit in with my recycling ethics…
However, when my Dad remarried in the early 90s my step-mum had the most amazing dress she found for £30 in an antique market. It was a simple 60s full length sheaf (my SM is a child of the 60s, has the pixie crop and everything) in white silk, with a simple long-sleeved lace longcoat to be worn over. She looked AMAZING – and pretty much turned me onto vintage fashions to begin with!
Or, try Etsy for a really beautiful gown AND save!
I picked out my dress already, probably will spend at most $500. I’m not quite YET engaged, but hey I’m a normal girl. Heh.
And we can worry less about THAT future cost …. and maybe I’ll get a “better” ring, ha ha.
Amen, sister! I totally agree about not buying a wedding dress- with cute options like the ones you’ve featured, there’s no reason to!
i totally agree. buy a bridesmaids gown in white or off white or some other amazing color like azure blue. many of the modern bridesmaids dresses are more beautiful than the cookie-cutter bridal gowns out there. try lazaro or vera wang. the dress will run no more than $250- $500.
[...] Style Amor – Not buying a wedding gown from a traditional boutique [...]
[...] from Unfunded, Our Ocean’s coverage of Vivienne Westwood’s appearance on Jonathan Ross and Style Amor’s refusal to buy a wedding dress, as well as some insightful interviews and gorgeous [...]
[...] Style Amor – Check out why I have given up buying a wedding gown from a traditional bridal boutique. [...]
[...] Style Amor – Check out why I have given up buying a wedding gown from a traditional bridal boutique. [...]
Good and in depth article but full of useful information
[...] from Unfunded, Our Ocean’s coverage of Vivienne Westwood’s appearance on Jonathan Ross and Style Amor’s refusal to buy a wedding dress, as well as some insightful interviews and gorgeous [...]
[...] from Unfunded, Our Ocean’s coverage of Vivienne Westwood’s appearance on Jonathan Ross and Style Amor’s refusal to buy a wedding dress, as well as some insightful interviews and gorgeous give-aways. [...]
[...] I Refuse To Buy a Wedding Dress! » Style Amor (No Ratings Yet) Loading … [...]
[...] I Refuse To Buy a Wedding Dress! » Style Amor [...]
Thanks so much guys for all your comments, I appreciate all your input, I am planning to get married next spring still working out the date ;) BTW I will keep you guys updated with my pick so stay tuned,
Much love,
<3 Glendy
I am getting married in 3 weeks. I made my own dress.
Well, I didn’t sew it, I tried to but I am not that good with the machine. So I made the design, and my friend who is a fashion designer sew it for me. It is so unique and special and costs only 30 Euros for the fabric. I will cut it short and change the desigh and be able to wear it as normal dress for going out after the wedding.
i am going to use my Prom Dress for my wedding Day, i might make it fantasy, but i think it will be a good memory… i love the dress i wore for prom, and i think it might not hurt to use it more then once… lol. i am happy with my dress, so do not go spending money on a dress you are going to use for less then 24 hours…
[...] may remember Glendy from an interview we did earlier. Her recent article, I Refuse to Buy a Wedding Dress!, made some waves in the blogosphere and I immediately wanted to hear more of her thoughts on the [...]
YES YES YES! i want a mint green frilly cocktail dress for my lovely day.
I could not agree with you more – you make so many great points here and voice them so well. I hate all the fuss that weddings generate, not to mention the fact that people seem to accept the astronomical cost as something that is “normal”. I want my wedding to truly be about love and having a special celebration of that, not a celebration of wealth or pompous attempts to commodify that.
In fact, I don’t think I want a conventional engagement ring. I can’t bear the thought of my boyfriend spending (ie. wasting) so much money on such a tiny, frivolous thing when we could rather spend that money on fabulous travels together.
Thanks so much for speaking up and refusing to be another bride who gets sucked into the ridiculous hype.
I’m also looking at vintage options, as well as having my gown made through Etsy.com (I found this one shop, Bridal Bliss Designs at http://www.etsy.com/shop/bridalblissdesigns; her work looks amazing!)
Also, addressing the issue of using your dress over and over again, I once saw a Carolina Herrera wedding gown that had a zip-away hem, so you could have a formal, floor-length look, and then shorten it to a cocktail length for the reception. Why not try incorporating that element into a custom gown?
Just my $0.02. Thanks for the awesome post!
I’m not the biggest fan of the idea of a wedding dress, in a traditional sense. I never thought I’d agree to get married, so I never had to “dream wedding” scenario in my head. Now that I am – I kinda just love the idea of getting a dress I will wear again, so that when I do, I can go through my day thinking, “this is the dress I married in” – a perfect wow moment that lasts the whole day!
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ps, also didn’t get the traditional engagement ring… I’m getting a pair of shoes instead! :D
Miz´s last blog ..Homelessness
I didn’t want a conventional dress either. I almost bought a cherry red 50s cocktail dress, but was afraid of buying online, as I’ve never done it before.
My quandary was solved when I walked into my favorite thrift store and discovered a champagne-coloured lace evening gown. It cost $9.50. It’s not my “dream dress” – I didn’t have a moment where I started crying about how it was “the One”. It did something better: it made the marriage feel real. I walked out the store so giddy at the money I’d saved and thoughts of the future swirling through my mind. What a great day.
I hope you can find something just as great. Good luck!
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Congratulations on the engagement! Wedding planning is so tricky… I can’t wait to see your choices!
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I don’t know if I am far too late, but I do say I like the first short dress, but not enough.
What if you bought a gown and had it shortened for further use?
i searched “garden collection reviews” and found you. i actually thought the red dress you have on (in ivory) would make a lovely wedding dress. mine was tea length and less than $200. i had it cleaned and boxed, but have been thinking about breaking it out and wearing it again … i’m sure you probably have it by now and it’s adorable – love your style!
I love your vintage dress idea. But do you know where I can find that $5.00 dress? Thanks. (:
Agree 100% Get a nice vintage dress and a quality corset to look much better and save money!!